Losing a Father

Am I ready for this? Will I ever get ready?

Since my father passed away, I’ve wondered when the day would come that I would right about my father again. I’ve been commanded by my mother to write a thank-you message for the post-wake. I honestly couldn’t muster the courage and determination to do so.

My father is very dear to me. He is very much part of who I am. Now, he’s gone, but in a better place. I can’t say I completely got over it, although it looks like I did. I think what I usually try to do to put myself together is not ponder too much on his leaving. Yet, at random times, memories play in mind. I even dream about him at times.

Actually, this blog page was intended to tell his story as he battled cancer. I started not to update when he became critical. There was a part of it that my family didn’t want to tell the public about the tough condition. Well, at that point, nobody was in their own self. It was of extreme emotions moment. We prayed, believed and was by daddy’s side. Describing how he had been getting weaker and weaker was heart-wrenching.

There had been a moment in my life when I went through too much emotions. I’ve learned a lot, but this was the most crucial lesson: It shall pass and God still has a great and wonderful plan. Whatever caused that agonizing season was nothing compared to what has happened to my dad. Still, I believe that the lesson is still the same. Although it applies to a deeper hurt- losing someone you couldn’t lose.

Dad’s loved ones experience different levels of despair in different ways. Yet dad rejoices since the day he left earth. He is in eternal joy in the kingdom of God- the one he loved most and served since the day he gave his life to Him.

His passing away made an impact to us spiritually. I thank God it wasn’t the wrong way, that is blaming God and losing faith in Him. That could happen if we ever thought how could a loving God not answer the prayers of His servant  , a very good person. Instead, we know that:

God makes everything beautiful in His time,

nothing can separate us from His love, neither death or life, 

there is eternal life,

and so much more .

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